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Collin Rodrigues Mumbai:
People in relationships usually trust each other, and often don’t think their partner would ever cheat on them. In the
absence of unusual behaviour, people rarely doubt their partners. Sadly, stories of cheating spouses aren’t in short supply.
According to a study conducted by the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, people care a lot about infidelity, but rarely discuss it with their partners. Around 200 people participated in the survey, out of which, 9% admitted to cheating on their partners. In fact, people who admitted to cheating said they had cheated twice as much as they thought their partners would have. In other words, people’s propensity to cheating is directly proportional to their suspicion on their partners.
It’s a vicious cycle
Bankers Naman Berry* (33), and Nalini Malhotra* (28) got married in 2012, but just months before their wedding, Berry found out that Malhotra was cheating on him, as she was involved with her ex-boyfriend. Malhotra eventually convinced her fiancé that they were just friends. Berry agreed to go ahead with the wedding on the condition that she will not keep any contact with her ex-boyfriend. The couple got married three months later.
Soon after their marriage, though, Malhotra started putting restrictions on Berry, as she feared he may cheat on her. She stopped him from talking to his female friends, started monitoring his phone and stopped him from talking to his female work colleagues after office hours. Berry thought she was doing it out of concern for their relationship, but he was wrong.
He says, “One day, I came home early without telling my wife and saw a chat window on her Gmail account. When I asked her who she was talking to, she said it was a friend. I then asked her if I could log her out of her account, as I wanted to log in, and that was when I saw her ex boyfriend’s name on the chat window.